The Year in Review

I don’t really know how I feel about “Year in Review” posts, but all the kids seem to be doing it, so I thought maybe this year I would join in. I don’t suppose it hurts anything to look back on a year while you stand on the precipice of a new one—though tomorrow morning we’ll all wake up and the only thing truly different will be remembering to say the right number on those rare occasions when we say the year (“I mean, it’s 20XX, for chrissake. Why can’t we [insert whatever here]?!”]

Ruby

My little vixen of a niece obviously came along in 2010, but you know how babies are: their personalities don’t really appear until they cease to be squishy masses along about five or six months. I am happy to say that in 2011, the Chandlers moved basically down the road from me (only 2.5 hours away instead of 6), and I’ve been able to visit her more often. But thanks to the wonders of camera phones and blogs, we’ve been documenting her daily life essentially since she was born. While I wonder sometimes what she’ll think of this site as she grows (and whether we’ll be able to keep it up), I think everyone will agree that getting to see her every day makes it less difficult that there are so many miles between all of us. Of course it doesn’t change the fact that when you see her photo, your arms ache to hold her.

La Paz

I had an unbelievably lucky travel year. It began in February when Joe’s brother very generously allowed me and a friend to use his (what is it, a condo?) place in La Paz (Mexico, not Bolivia). I frolicked on the beach, watched birds I’d never seen before, fished, snorkeled, and generally stayed the hell away from what was becoming an awful situation at work.

Yen

It wouldn’t be me if I were suddenly all gushy and silly in this blog. But I was so happy to meet Yen back in March. As the months have gone by, I have realized how difficult other relationships were, how much work and compromising had gone one—well, had been done by me. To finally have someone who just wants to be kind to me, and who is ready to go see what’s around the next corner as I am… It’s a gift that I keep thinking will be snatched away from me.

And have you ever seen anyone so adorable?

Man, I’m going to pay later for having posted that.

Costa Rica

After knowing each other two whole months, Yen and I said to each other, “How about a trip to Costa Rica?” There was so much to love about this trip. Hiking, terrific food, a wonderfully cliche volcano, quetzals, swallow-tailed kites, tree frogs, rain forests with long boardwalks, more mango juice than a person should drink in one sitting, fresh pineapple from the Pan-America Highway, a black-sand beach, discovering how well we travel together—and oh yes, I held a tarantula.

Quebec

“Want to go to Quebec for the weekend?” Well, ok! More travel. I can’t believe I got to use my passport three times in 2011. I know Canada doesn’t normally count, but I like to think that when you don’t speak the language, you get to say you’re in a foreign land. One of the best moments was when Yen and a waitress were carrying on in French and Vietnamese while I sat looking off into the rainy distance, responsible for nothing except eating what was put in front of me.

David’s graduation and birthday

A very serious milestone occurred this year: David turned 18 and graduated from high school. He’s always been a salty old man, but now it’s official! He’s gotten through his first semester of college just fine, and I think is looking forward to seeing what’s next after all this school nonsense ends. I really can’t believe he’s so old, which of course means I can’t believe that I am so old. We have talked only a few times over the years about how hard it is to be so far apart. But he understands that this is more my home than the Middle could be. What he may not know or always remember is how hard it is to not see him every minute, and how I think of him constantly and wish he was with me. I also wish I were half as mature and reasonable as he is. When we’re together, I try to remember that he’s an 18-year-old man and doesn’t want to be hugged all the time, but sometimes it’s so hard not to just squeeze him.

Job change

This was a big one, and a long time coming. I really loved my job at MIT. I loved my team even more. Deciding to leave a group of people like that is one of the most difficult decisions I’ve made in my life. They weren’t just coworkers, but true friends. And of course we’re all still friends now, but to wake up each morning and know you’re going to spend the whole day with people you generally enjoy and care about it is simply priceless.

The problem was that I couldn’t watch any longer while the management of the organization slowly destroys such a good, good thing. I don’t need to be saving the world or making millions of dollars. But I want to be part of something that tries to be good or helpful, and is interested in the well-being of the people within it. I tried hard to be a good manager and serve my team’s needs in a way that I think managers should. But it doesn’t matter in the end if you’re doing that when others are deliberately mismanaging or ignoring their own teams. Leaving was perhaps the greatest disservice I could have done to these people I cared so much about, but by the end, I was so angry all the time that I felt it was right.

The good news is I believe I found a manager who is good, and who has created a team of people who look out for each other and help each other. And while this organization isn’t saving the world either, it certainly has good products and in their own way enable good. I still dream every day of gathering up my old flock and starting something new and ambitious, but have I mentioned lately my debt?

Backyard tourism

One of the things I enjoyed the most this year was the ongoing backyard tourism I performed. I am lucky to live in a very interesting part of the country, a place where history and a city, woods and beach, and even mountains all collide within a few miles of each other. I have always tried to get out and enjoy these things, but this year more than any other, I managed to try new things over and over. Much of that is thanks to finally having a companion for these adventures, but it’s also just remembering the mindset that there is a whole world outside my doorstep to be enjoyed.

Ok, that’s it. Nostalgia complete! Let’s get back to your regularly scheduled, cynical but perhaps lovable program.